yeah it's been awhile but life's been a bit more busy of late. please chill cheetahs and rest easy for i have been ingesting my swell share of drive-in fare. just last week i sat through an ever so sweet double dip of Breakin'2: Electric Boogaloo and the classic eco horror job Frogs. you gotta love watching a 21 year old 100lb. not yet badd ass Ice-T mc a bunch of day-glo clad mullet pop and lockers backed with moustache king Sam Elliot and a bunch of snobby southerners getting taken down by a union of cranky creepy crawlin' critters fired up about fools dumping trash in the swamps of Florida. seriously how can you not like a film whos most annoying character gets chomped to death by a snapping turtle? ah the good old days, when any animal you could think of could go icky bingo and kill you deader than Dillinger and it would make an damn entertaining movie!
speaking of things that are fun to watch kill people. snipers! the movie Targets is a fine little gem lensed in the late 60's by Peter the Last Picture Show Bogdonovich. it's basically the celluloid son of a favour owed by legend Boris Karloff to Roger "Mr. Drive-In" Corman and Peter Bogdonovich's spin on real life sniping madman Charles Whitman. story goes that Boris owed Roger a couple days worth of filming for some reason and Peter was wanting to do a movie inspired in part by the factual antics of texan Charles Whitman, who after killing his wife and mother, ascended a tower on the campus of the University of Texas and started shooting at whomever was happening by. talkin' real life horror here friends. art imitates life or whatever and all and the result in this case is Targets.
the plot is as follows. aging horror star Byron Orlok, played beautifully here by Karloff in a turn basically as HIMSELF, is wanting to retire. he's wonderfully cantankerous towards the biz and feels that it's high time to hang up his brand of outdated victorian horror. his people however want him to at least put in one final personal appearance at an LA drive-in. this works in nicely later.
meanwhile across town the mild mannered Bobby has a sweet girlfriend, doting parents and a mint Ford Mustang with a trunk full of guns that would make the A-Team envious. well for no real discernible reason he wakes up one day and shoots his wife and mom and for good measure sprays a poor delivery boys' innards all over the kitchen floor. then Bobby leaves the following note:
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:
IT IS NOW 11:40 AM. MY WIFE IS STILL ASLEEP, BUT WHEN SHE WAKES UP
I AM GOING TO KILL HER. THEN I AM GOING TO KILL MY MOTHER.
I KNOW THEY WILL GET ME, BUT THERE WILL BE MORE KILLING BEFORE I DIE.
so cool as a cucumber Bobby loads up his arsenal, stocks up on ammo and then parks himself on top of a refinery roof alongside the highway. after a few cokes and a peanut butter sandwich he figures it's time to get the ball rollin' and starts shooting at ANYONE driving by. i wanna say that these scenes are among the films most viseral and compelling. due in part to there being no score during the sequence and the actor playing Bobby's icey demeanor. you cannot help watching this and feeling a little unnerved, always a good thing if you ask me. so somehow Bobby and his shoot'em up shenanigans manage to get the attention of the police and he is forced to flee. and wouldn't you just know it, he ends up hiding out at the same drive-in where Byron Orlok is making his appearance. seeing another opportunity to pour some more hot lead on unsuspecting drive-in patrons popcorn, Bobby ends up hiding up behind the screen and sniping people through a small hole he cuts in it. after he dead eyes a guy in a phone booth, a couple making some sweet steam, a crying kids' dad, and the friggin' projectionist for crying out loud he once again garners everyones attention and a bedlam ridden mass flight from Bobby's gun sight breaks out. in the ensuing bullet flying mayhem our marksman, who has shot what seems like half of California at this point, goes that final step too far. he wings the old horror star Byron Orlok's personal assistant in the shoulder. even worse for Bobby is that a now steaming mad Orlok sees were he is hiding and with cane in hand strides right on over for a bit of the old face to face. Bobby in an awestruck panic freezes up and it ends with with old man Karloff pimp slapping Bobby into submission like he was some street walking sally a few johns short of her payout!! awesome stuff. three big stars for this more than watchable, highly enjoyable, low budget bullet parade.
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